Comments on: Why Is Help A Four Letter Word?

By: Ramona L

Thu, 07 Jan 2021 01:13:09 +0000

As a mother of two and a former nanny for many years I think having help with raising children is wonderful. I was lucky to be part of two amazing families over a 12 yr period. Those children who are now in there 20’s still stay in touch. Being a nanny can is very rewarding and certainly made me be a better mother when I had my own children.

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By: Ali

Mon, 07 Jan 2019 14:55:33 +0000

In reply to emily moran.

Emily – while this statement may be what YOU believe to be true, it is definitely NOT always the case and you cannot assume so.

We have a 6 & 3 year old, both work in Boston full time with an hour+ commute each way, and we need a nanny half of the day when preschool and kindergarten is out because there are no options for my preschooler after school. There is no program that exists near me for that age-group except for daycare. I have had him on the wait-list for the daycare in our town going on a year and a half, so that still isn’t even an option.

We also have no family nearby who can help us, so a nanny is really our only option. Or me or my husband quit our jobs to be home after school.

When they can both be in the same after-school program perhaps we will do that, it is a little bit more to pay for a nanny, but just because someone puts their child into a program OR has a nanny doesn’t mean they are avoiding aspects of parenting. It’s survival to get through this time while they’re young and both parents are working and enjoying their jobs. Agreed it is a necessary luxury and we feel very lucky we can afford to have a nanny while we work!

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By: Terra Scholz

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 20:25:27 +0000

I have both been a nanny and employed a nanny. It is a very sacred position. Children often need someone to talk to, learn from, and laugh with other than their parents. Parents sometimes need the viewpoint of another adult who sees your children more objectively. A child can never have too many adults who love them. Thanks so much for addressing this topic. May I remind everyone reading this to respect and love your darling nannies. Praise and thank them often.

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By: Milena

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 14:15:53 +0000

Very well put together post! My favorite line is about how every parent is “a mix of good and bad” in his/her way. As a stay-at-home mom, I actually feel pressure in the exact opposite way from my mom friends who work full time. They often talk about how they are so glad that their daughters (especially) can have a mom who is independent and works as opposed to a mom who cooks, cleans and drives them around all day. I am sure they don’t mean it to be hurtful but sometimes it is. It makes me doubt if I made thr right decision to stay home with the kids while they are little, even though I know that it was. Of course I want my daughter to have a career, but if she chooses to stay with her kids while they are little, I hope her contemporaries won’t look down on her for it. God knows being home with them 24/7 and doing absolutely every single thing is incredibly hard and tests every fiber of my being. I guess it goes to show that moms will be judged no matter what they do, because it’s impossible to please everyone’s point of view.

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By: Emily Hudson

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 10:29:11 +0000

This was beautifully put and I agree with you 100%!!!! Not having kids of my own yet, I can totally relate to the quality of life the love from a nanny brings, because my brother and I were raised by nanny’s from all over the world! I never felt my parents were not there, or not present, both also working full time jobs as well. In fact, providing this type of upbringing is so important to me, that I’d be bummed if I couldn’t include the help! *noted to fiancé* lol! I think you’re doing a wonderful job on all different fronts of your life and I’m always inspired by you and your family! Thank you for sharing this post…it’s reminded me of how lucky I’ve been and how enchanted a childhood can be with amazing people around to help shape you !. I still have very close relationships with the women that helped raise me to this day…and so does my brother. I’m sure Marlowe and Major will absorb the best of it all, like we have. Happy New Year!

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By: io

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 09:06:24 +0000

I am from Greece and here its super common to have nannies and help for the house etc. Feel no shame ladies..whatever you need to be happy and calm..which translates into the rest of the family being happy!

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By: Gisselle

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 07:01:27 +0000

In reply to Irina Visan.

My husband and I were raised the same way as you and your boyfriend and are having the same discussions about childcare! I would love to hear if Eva and Kyle had different views about it as well!

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By: Gisselle

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 06:58:52 +0000

This is a beautiful post. As someone who plans to be a working mom, this post is so encouraging. I believe that having a positive mindset before we do something can help us so much when the time comes, and this post is so real and encouraging! You have a wonderful, admirable outlook on raising your children. Thank you for sharing.

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By: Gabriela Gonçalves

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 04:10:47 +0000

This article is so great! I’m a speech pathologist and I work with young kids all over NYC and the kids with nannies always do so well and make such great progress because nanny’s love kids (duh) why else would they be in that profession! And parents can follow through with my techniques cause they simply have a more manageable workload. My husband and I are heading for the ‘burbs in a couple of months (after a complete reno of a house that hasn’t been updated since 1955) and my parents are planning on moving closer with the “it takes a village” mentality. They themselves raised my sister and I in a three family home that housed my godmother and my grandparents. But I can’t help what wonder what can we do to help the mom in need who doesn’t have either option? I know a lot of us may feel like offering to help may make a mother feel even more self-conscious or insecure in her inability to do it all, all the time (I know this has backfired on me this way before). So how can we shift the culture driving us to think if we can’t do it all we don’t deserve to have a child? I say offer to help whenever you can and accept help when it’s offered.

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By: Kelly Wissbroecker

Thu, 03 Jan 2019 01:51:44 +0000

I am a nanny of two boys and a new mom. I bring my son to their house everyday. I love being a nanny and I love those kids so much. Having my son there feels like the best of both worlds. The only downsides are that I seldom (never) get a break and that my workload hasn’t changed I now just have another little one to contend with. The family I work for treats me and my son like family and are so kind. My husband and I could not have asked for two greater “big brothers” for your son.

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